well i'm sure it doesn't seem it but i've been tryin to avoid internet use alot as of late...at least as much as i can. just still so much going through my head...i think. just thoughts on angel...alot of peoples number one hated person. which i'm not gonna stop anyone from hating her, its everyone's own perogative on how they feel. i mean i know she doesn't like having people feel that way about her, who would. i know i would care if it was out of my select group, but other than that i really don't give two shits. fuck the rest of the world as one would say. but i'm straying her...i guess. alot of my thoughts have been on her as of late. which would probably piss specy off once he reads this, and i'm sorry dude, i still love her and would gladly take her back if she chose to come back to me. you know you're my boy, my friend, a heterosexual life partner if you would.
anyways i've been thinking alot on her. i've called her a couple times, had some really good conversations and such, and no i'm not letting those little things get my hopes all up in the air. its just nice things to have again. we know so much about each other, and we were always able to just sit there and talk about nothing in general and enjoy it. and thats what its been like. nothing really much to talk about, but we have talked and it was pretty good. quite enjoyable. i miss that. i miss her, and the relaxness i get when i loose myself because of her.
like i said i'm not lettin my hopes go sky high, or anywhere near that. now i am hoping for things, i won't lie, and i'm throwin a comment out there now and then to her hinting at such...well probably not hinting but as close as i can get without comin right out and sayin it...i think. i am hoping for...something. and it is with her. it would always be a hope for her.
~Frank the Tank
posted by zefyur @ 7:24 PM,
4 Comments:
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At 11:47 PM,
all we are is a spec in life said...
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Mike don't be sorry. I am not upset and if you are happy, then be happy. I think I have said my piece and I know I have overstepped my bounds many times but that is it. I am not going to site here and lecture you every time you say her name because it is going to confuse you. Good, bad or indifferent just be happy. You are a good friend and a brother to me and I just want you to be happy. In the end it isnt what chris or jen or randy or nancy or your friends and family want. It is what you want and what makes you happy.
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At 2:37 AM,
RC666 said...
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Actually it is what I want. So Fuck you Specy. Talk, have fun, try not to get your hopes up. She might just be lonely and enjoy the conversation, try to just do the sam3e.
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At 3:20 AM,
zefyur said...
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i'm not lettin the conversations get my hopes all high. at the moment i'm just enjoyin them, when they do happen. i'd like more, but i'm tryin not to push for that. just talkin, and just enjoyin hearin her.
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At 5:48 AM,
The Devil said...
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This is rather confusing for anyone to experience, as I went through the same thing when my XH was in UAE, and I had asked for divorce before he left. It confused me too much when he would call. I would be fine as long as I didn't have to talk to him, but when we did, it was heartwrenching. No one can define your own happiness. Only you know what makes you happy, and what you need to do to get there. Not saying that your friends shouldn't be able to warn you of things that might hurt you, but you are the only person who can decide what is best for you and your situation.
Hopefully everything works out how it should.
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all we are is a spec in life said...